It’s been quite some time since I’ve participated in an Absolute Write Water Cooler forums‘ blog chain and I’ve picked quite the month to get back to it.
This month’s prompt goes as follow: “Write a location description, and make us feel as if we are there. No dialogue, no introductory comments, just a location. We’re the tourists, you’re the guide.”
At first, I thought I could grab something from one of my WIPs. The search led me to realize that I don’t do pure description. At all. I mean, there might be a couple of sentences here and there but most of the information about the environment and characters is shared through the action.
Which isn’t bad, per se, it just doesn’t work for this prompt.
I finally decided to write a… errr… descriptive story!? It’s kind of full of action and yet nothing really happens.
Anyway.
I made it a drabble (story of a hundred words) because Monday is Drabble Day here.
So yes, drabbler, you’re at the right place for this week’s story, and AWers, feel free to drop by every Monday for a low-pressure writerly start for your week. *shameless self-promotion off*
Without further ado, here is my description!
Scenery
The undertones of the running river complemented the melody of rustling leaves. A hart’s hooves thumped as it galloped in the meadow, playfully beating the bass drum to the cricket’s hi-hat. Frogs blues-ed the tune. Birds chirped in harmony, back vocals to the eclectic symphony.
And the opera smelled of the chlorophyll brought to life by the sweet embrace of leaves and morning dew. The four o’clock flowers slowly left the floor and the other blooms readied for their dance. They swayed with the wind, intoxicated by the growing warmth.
As the sun rose, the dissonance and left feet returned.
Here are the other participants in the chain. Check them out!
orion_mk3 – http://nonexistentbooks.wordpress.com (link to this month’s post)
juniper – http://www.katjuniper.com/ (link to this month’s post)
LadyMage – http://www.katherinegilraine.com/ (link to this month’s post)
dolores haze – http://dianedooley.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
jkellerford – http://jennykellerford.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Ralph Pines – http://ralfast.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
AuburnAssassin – http://clairegillian.com/ (link to this month’s post)
pezie – http://www.erinbrambilla.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Inkstrokes – http://drlong67.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
WildScribe – http://DionneObesoBlog.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Guardian – http://daewrites.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Lyra Jean – http://lyratorres.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
egoodlett – http://wordlarceny.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
cwachob – http://www.corriewachob.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Aheïla – Guess what? You’re here!
Robbi Sommers Bryant – www.robbibryant.blogspot.com
TheMindKiller – http://www.jabberwocky.ws/
Irissel – http://irissel.blogspot.com/
xcomplex – http://www.arielemerald.blogspot.com/
June 20th, 2011 at 12:18 pm
[…] Aheïla – https://thewriteaholicblog.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post) […]
June 20th, 2011 at 12:22 pm
Nice! A dream and a fairy tale all rolled into one. 😀
June 21st, 2011 at 6:08 am
Thank you!
June 20th, 2011 at 1:46 pm
I really like the imagery you use, especially since I’m in the same boat about descriptions.
June 21st, 2011 at 6:09 am
I’m glad you enjoyed it. And it’s good to know I’m not alone!
June 20th, 2011 at 3:21 pm
Very beautiful prose, Aheila. I definitely felt “there”. However, I”m with you on not having long stretches of description in my works. To be honest, if they’re long enough for me to figure out that I’m being treated to a prose feast, that’s usually my key to skip. I know; I’m terrible! There are pages and pages of Jean Auel’s Clan of the Cave Bear books I’ve passed over. Shhh….
June 21st, 2011 at 6:11 am
*laughs* I promise I won’t tell. 😉
I tend to have a hard time reading long descriptions too and end up skipping paragraphs here and there or falling asleep.
June 20th, 2011 at 11:04 pm
Welcome back to the blog chain, Aheila!
Lovely combo of nature and music. Well done!
June 21st, 2011 at 6:11 am
Hello Diane! It’s nice to be back! Thank you for stopping by!
June 20th, 2011 at 11:05 pm
[…] to this month’s post) Aheïla – https://thewriteaholicblog.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post) Robbi Sommers Bryant – www.robbibryant.blogspot.com (link to this month’s post) […]
June 20th, 2011 at 11:37 pm
Very nice. I especially loved this line, “A hart’s hooves thumped as it galloped in the meadow, playfully beating the bass drum to the cricket’s hi-hat.” I could hear the whole thing :).
June 21st, 2011 at 6:13 am
Hello Erin! Nice to meet you!
I’m glad the metaphors make sense to other people than me. I really liked the drum line of my song too. 😉
June 21st, 2011 at 8:08 am
[…] (link to this month’s post) Aheïla – https://thewriteaholicblog.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post) Robbi Sommers Bryant – http://www.robbibryant.blogspot.com (link to this month’s post) […]
June 21st, 2011 at 8:11 am
Love the nature’s symphony! Great job pairing the right sounds.
June 21st, 2011 at 7:50 pm
Thanks!
June 21st, 2011 at 11:58 am
[…] (link to this month’s post) Aheïla – https://thewriteaholicblog.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post) Robbi Sommers Bryant – http://www.robbibryant.blogspot.com (link to this month’s post) […]
June 21st, 2011 at 12:46 pm
Loved the line where you could smell the chlorophyll. It reminded me of the movie “Bambi” when they are singing the song “Drip, Drip, Drop, little April showers”. It’s one of the very few Disney movies that I enjoy, excluding those made by Pixar.
June 21st, 2011 at 7:51 pm
Oh! I didn’t think of that! I definitely see it now!
June 22nd, 2011 at 12:21 pm
I really like your vivid expression and beautiful description. And the motif is an interesting departure from your general style which accentuates your versatile writing. So I guess that all means I liked it. 😉
June 22nd, 2011 at 12:36 pm
I try to keep myself on my toes. 😉
Thanks for the nice detailed comment. It always appreciated.
June 22nd, 2011 at 2:06 pm
Beautiful! I love that you include sound and smells as well as visuals, it gives you a full image of the whole scene 🙂 And the last line, “As the sun rose, the dissonance and left feet returned.” makes me wonder what’s going on in this lovely setting, too… 😉
June 23rd, 2011 at 2:42 pm
Thank you!
In my mind the last line is about a nearby road or something. But I could be wrong. *laughs*
June 22nd, 2011 at 10:43 pm
[…] The previous person in the chain was: Aheïla […]
June 23rd, 2011 at 8:11 pm
[…] orion_mk3 (link to this month’s post) juniper (link to this month’s post) LadyMage (link to this month’s post) dolores haze (link to this month’s post) jkellerford (link to this month’s post) Ralph Pines (link to this month’s post) AuburnAssassin (link to this month’s post) pezie (link to this month’s post) Inkstrokes (link to this month’s post) WildScribe (link to this month’s post) Guardian (link to this month’s post) Lyra Jean (link to this month’s post) egoodlett (link to this month’s post) cwachob (link to this month’s post) Aheila (link to this month’s post) […]
June 24th, 2011 at 10:04 am
Aleiha, you know I love your work – all of it, but I think this is my fav piece yet. Your discriptions are beautiful, well thought out & put together in a very clever manner. Simply awesome.
June 26th, 2011 at 6:36 pm
Thank you! Sometimes, the simplest things are the most powerful. 😉
June 24th, 2011 at 2:20 pm
I totally agree with you in your comments when you say you don’t like long descriptions and tend to skip paragraphs if they’re too much. I do the same thing!
But yours isn’t too long, it’s just right. I like how you bring the setting to life by creating the symphony.
June 26th, 2011 at 6:41 pm
I like it when things are breathing. 😉
June 24th, 2011 at 5:07 pm
My drabble’s a bit late (sorry!) but here it is…
http://wp.me/p13Itw-DE
June 26th, 2011 at 6:44 pm
Finally found a minute to read and comment!
June 25th, 2011 at 7:52 am
What a beautiful, ethereal piece. It transported me. Well done!
(oh, and welcome back to the chain) 🙂
June 26th, 2011 at 6:42 pm
Thank you very much! It’s good to be back!
August 17th, 2013 at 2:38 am
[…] The previous person in the chain was: Aheïla […]