NaNoWriMo Excerpt – Flawed

Yes, it’s this time of the week again!
To perform a particularly difficult task, Sa’athy (the main character) pulled her two bodies – a human and a huge white tiger – together, forming one hybrid body in front of her human traveling companions.
This scene happens shortly after.

/i\ This is NaNoWriMo writing. It’s messy and barely edited. /i\

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Tuomas was the first one to approach me. I had managed to sleep a couple of hours while he tossed and turned under his covers. He finally decided to tap my shoulder and request a private chat. I grabbed one of my blankets and invited him to follow me; my Animae had scouted for the perfect one-on-one meeting place before I went to sleep.
A few paces away from our campsite, nature provided us with two improvised chairs. One was an old tree which unearthed roots curve into a cradle big enough for a grown adult. I wrapped myself in it and pointed the big rock to Tuomas.
“One of the first pieces of advice you told me was ‘if I ever become one body, run’. I didn’t need too.” But he had done it several time in his head since the beginning of the night.
“It’s still a good advice.” I sat a little straighter. “Today, I morphed in a very controlled environment. It helped. We won’t always have that.”
“But the will it must take to perform this! Surely you can’t do it by mistake.”
“Wrong. My natural state is to be one. This,” I ran hand along my body and waved in the general direction of my Animae,” is my will at work.”
“So if you’re stunned. But you said –”
“– What I said remains true. Except if both my bodies fall side by side.”
“Then?”
“I wake up instantaneously. As myself. And I go on a rampage until each en every menacing figure around me bites the dust.” He looked a bit scared. That was good. He needed to understand how dangerous and uncontrollable I could become in certain circumstances. “That’s why my bodies never sleep close together. Though my Personae could use my Animae’s warmth from time to time.” I pulled my blanket tighter around me.
“Why do you want me to be afraid of the real you?”
“Because there’s a reason our reputation is what it is. The Dianaes’ bloodlust has only disappeared because we tore ourselves apart. Our true form may go off at the slightest provocation.”
Cradling his chin in a hand, Tuomas analysed what I had said for a couple of seconds. He tried to figure something out: a cure, how we worked or just why the hell we were this way?
“Why do the guardians of justice have such a rage in them?”
Third choice it was.
“Three reasons, actually.” I chuckled at his surprise. “Yes, we’ve put some thought into the meaning of this over the millenniums of our existence.”
“Okay. One reason at a time so the little human’s brain can digest it.”
“How could we call ourselves the Great Hunters if we failed to understand our pray?” Tuomas nodded. That first reason was simple enough. “How could we remember that peace only exists as long as you work for it if the ghost of violence didn’t haunt us?” A few seconds passed before he gave me another nod. “How could we not proclaim ourselves gods if we weren’t inherently flawed?”